"DO YOU HAVE TO BE BORN A COBRASAURUS!!!!! MAN, OR CAN ANYBODY BECOME ONE?!!"
ANSWER!!:
ANYONE CAN BE ONE, PROVIDED HE HAS THREE THINGS!!:
1. A WILLINGNESS TO EAT AN ENTIRE WALRUS!! YOU MAY NEVER HAVE TO, BUT YOU'D BETTER BE WILLING!! AND NO, WE'RE NOT GOING TO KILL IT FOR YOU!!
2. THE ABILITY TO SMACK THUNDER UPSIDE THE HEAD!! AGAIN, YOU MAY NEVER HAVE TO, BUT ISN'T IT NICE TO KNOW YOU CAN?!!
3. A 3148-LB. BENCH PRESS!! OBVIOUSLY!!
I'LL ALSO ACCEPT:
SWIMMING THE PACIFIC ... WITH SHARKS!!
FLYING AN A-10 LIKE A KITE!!
DISCOVERING A NEW MOON, AND THEN DESTROYING IT ... WITH SHARKS!!
THROWING BOTSWANA LIKE A FRISBEE!!
ATTACKING RUSSIA IN WINTER ... WITH SHARKS!!
SWALLOWING EIGHT DOZEN LARGE LIVE SHARKS (SHARKS OPTIONAL)!!
AND THAT'S ALL THERE IS TO IT!!
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