ASK A COBRASAURUS!!!! MAN #62

James W. OF WOONSOCKET, RI ASKS: 

WHAT EXACTLY IS A LASER MULE, ANYWAY?

ANSWER!!: 

THATS A QUESTION THAT GOES RIGHT TO THE HEART OF WHAT IT MEANS TO BE A COBRASAURUS!!!!!!! MAN!! HOWEVER, SINCE YOU DON'T KNOW, YOU MUST BE A SKIRT-WEARIN' FAIRY-MARY, AND I'M NOT GOING TO ANSWER IT!!

COBRASAURUS!!!!! TIP FOR COBRASAURUS!!!!! MEN #8!!

SOME SCIENTISTS THINK THAT SUGAR MAY BE LINKED TO HEART DISEASE!!  BUT YOU KNOW WHAT'S NEVER BEEN LINKED TO HEART DISEASE?!!

SPRINKLING LIVE WATER MOCCASINS ON YOUR CEREAL!!

IT AIN'T EASY BEING A COBRASAURUS!!!!! MAN!!

Having forgotten to ask permission first,

the sun just rose on a world of hurt.

BEING A COBRASAURUS!!!!!! MAN'S NOT AN EASY JOB, BUT IT NEEDS DOING!! BESIDES, THE OCEAN'S NOT GOING TO PUNCH ITSELF IN THE STOMACH!! NOT EVEN BILLY OCEAN WILL DO THAT!! DO YOU THINK I LIKE WAKING UP THE FAMILY WOLERINE EVERY MORNING BY ATTACKING ITS FACE?!! ACTUALLY, I DO!! DO YOU THINK I GET SOME KIND OF PLEASURE FROM PUTTING A FULL NELSON ON THE SUN FOR A LITTLE TOO LIPPY?!! AGAIN, OF COURSE I DO!! DO I SOMEHOW ENJOY PUNCHING LEOPARDS IN THEIR IGNORANT LEOPARD THROATS?!! BOY HOWDY I DO!! BUT IT'S STILL A JOB!! AND IT'S NOT A MATTER OF FINDING SOMEONE WHO WILL DO IT, BUT OF FINDING SOMEONE WHO CAN!!