HOW MUCH DOES INTEREST COUNT TOWARD COBRASAURUS!!!!!NESS?!!

A PROMISING CANDIDATE, DANIEL GRAIG, HAS EXPRESSED HIS GREAT BRITISH INTEREST IN BEING RECOGNIZED AS AN OFFICIAL COBRASAURUS!!!!! MAN!!




UNFORTUNATELY FOR CRAIG, HE WAS DISMISSED EARLY ON IN THE SCREENING PROCESS WHEN HE FAILED TO EAT THE SURVIVING LOSER OF AN ILLEGAL SIBERIAN BEAR-WRESTLING BATTLE-ROYAL IN ITS ENTIRETY . . . OR EVEN JUST A NIBBLE!!

THE BEAR IS RECOVERING HANDSOMELY, BOTH PHYSICALLY AND MENTALLY FROM HIS LACKLUSTER PERFORMANCE AGAINST THE WINNER, TANGAKWANU, BUT HAS SUFFERED CHRONIC DIARRHEA SINCE TAKING TWO PERFECTLY SYMMETRICAL CHOMPS OUT OF CRAIG'S FLEEING, COWARDLY BUTTOCKS!!