THE COBRASAURUS!!!!! STYLE GUIDE!!

THE COBRASAURUS!!!!! STYLE GUIDE

 

THERE ARE ONLY A FEW SIMPLE RULES FOR WRITING THE COBRASAURUS!!!!! WAY!!:

 

1.  ALL-CAPS, ALL THE TIME!!  LOWER-CASE LETTERS CANNOT CONTAIN THE POWER OF A COBRASAURUS!!!!! MAN’S THOUGHTS, WHICH ARE LIKE A THERMONUCLEAR GUTSLAM IN THE BRAIN!!

 

2.  EVERY SENTENCE ENDS WITH AT LEAST TWO EXCLAMATION POINTS!!  THIS IS SELF-EXPLANATORY, UNLESS YOU ARE A SKIRT-WEARIN’ FAIRY-MARY!!

 

3.  “COBRASAURUS!!!!!” ALWAYS HAS FIVE EXCLAMATION POINTS, BECAUSE THAT’S JUST HOW THE RULES OF SPELLING WORK!!

 

4.  LIBERAL USE OF BOLD LETTERS IS ENCOURAGED!!  A COBRASAURUS!!!!! MAN MUST BE BOLD, LIKE A FORTY-FOOT PORCU-SHARK WITH MACHINE-GUN EYES!!  ALSO, I COLOR THE BOLD LETTERS RED, TO MAKE THEM STAND OUT AGAINST THE BACKGROUND!!

 

5.  I LABEL EVERY POST WITH “ILLEGAL SIBERIAN BEAR-WRESTLING”.  YOU CAN TRY TO BE AS AWESOME AS ME, OR CREATE YOUR OWN SIGNATURE LABEL, OR JUST NOT WORRY ABOUT IT!!

 

6.  IF YOU THINK YOU’RE BEING TOO RIDICULOUSLY MASCULINE, YOU’RE NOT BEING RIDICULOUSLY MASCULINE ENOUGH!!  YOU CAN ALWAYS GET MORE STOOPID-AWESOME!!  THE MODEL FOR COBRASAURUS!!!!! WRITING IS -- BELIEVE IT OR NOT!! -- IS AND TO THINK THAT I SAW IT ON MULBERRY STREET, BY DR. SUESS!!  GOING TOO FAR IS NEVER FAR ENOUGH!!