YOU’VE SEEN AROUND: ON WANTED POSTERS, ON THE BACKS OF THE
BADDEST BIKER JACKETS, ETCHED INTO THE SURFACE OF THE DARKSIDE OF THE MOON –
IT’S THE OFFICIAL COBRASAURUS!!!!! BRAND!!
IT IS A THING OF BEAUTY, A SIGHT TO BEHOLD… A MASTERPIECE
INDEED!! WE MAY BE ROUGH AND DIRTY SPACE-WOODSMAN-JACKANAUTS THAT DON’T WEAR
UNDERWEAR, BUT WE’RE ARTISITIC!! PEOPLE WANT TO KNOW, WHAT DO THE ELEMENTS
SYMBOLIZE?!!
HERE’S THE ANSWER: THEY DON’T MEAN NOTHING, JACK!! C’MON,
ANY REAL MAN WITH THE HALF THE TESTOSTERBONES OF ABRAHAM LINCOLN COULD FIGURE
OUT THE FORMULA:
EXPLOSION + FIST HAMMER + RAILROAD SPIKES = ULTRAMANTOPIA!!
BUT IF YOU NEED IT TO ‘SYMBOLIZE’ SOMETHING, LET’S JUST SAY
IT SYMBOLIZES THE IMMINENT AND VIOLENT EXTERMINATION OF WORLD SISSYNESS,
METROSEXUALNESS, AND FEMININE QUASI-MALENESS!!
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